It’s been a long time since I felt like I had a good cry. My body has just been clinging onto whatever it is that it doesn’t want to let go of. In class tonight I finally felt like things were starting to shed more and more and I was able to have a release. However, not having eaten all day because I got so busy, and let my brain run me around, I lost the connection to my body, which I have been working so hard to stay in tune with.
I realized tonight how much of a transformation my life has been these last 5 years. I realized that I haven’t really taken the time to stop and slow down and life just keeps whipping me in the face but I just whip right back and I keep going and going and going and I stand tall and proud and powerful. But you know what, sometimes I crumble too.
This last week has been a big part of that journey. It’s the storm and the sunsets and the eclipses all rolling in at once, beautiful, but overwhelming.And I had forgotten how much of an empath I am and it has bee a real challenge for me this week. In my teaching and in my relationships. If you’re not sure what an Empath is, I can describe myself a little in hopes that you will understand and perhaps even relate.
As far back as 5 years old, I have been blessed with, and also cursed , with being able to absorb other peoples emotions and sometimes physical symptoms because I am so very sensitive. I filter the world though my intuition and more and more I feel as though I have a difficult time intellectualizing my feelings. It has become a real frustration for me. So I have been trying to figure out how to tap into it and utilize it to my advantage.
I feel like the universe is doing it’s thing and aligning me in exactly the places I need to be, but sometimes just feeling so much is difficult and this incapability of intellectualizing my feelings has got me like WHOA! I can’t figure it out. I can do all the Reiki sessions, and take all the yoga classes, and meditate more, but I can feel that my body needs a literal clearing, and I am curious as to what advice, or if you have this similar experience and what do YOU do?
My only conclusion is that I need to stop the 1,000 things I am doing, experience my feelings (alone), create space for my needs and do the things to meet them. So, I am making sure I take those actions with me into next week, as I am embark on my journey to teach at the Singularity Summit in San Francisco and then off to Portland for Camp Yes For Women. It’s funny because I realize that I am feeling emotionally the exact same way I was last year at this time. And I know getting the fuck out of dodge, AKA Los Angeles, is something that I just need to do in order to survive living here. And to take the time to remember it’s all connected. All of my gifts, and my circumstances, and my purpose, and my journey, and my destiny, everything is molding me. So as a wise friend said to me this evening, “Surrender, accept and release.”
I feel like the universe is doing it’s thing and aligning me in exactly the places I need to be, but sometimes just feeling so much is difficult and this incapability of intellectualizing my feelings has got me like WHOA. Wait, I said that already. I really mean it! My only conclusion is that I need to stop the 1,000 things I am doing, experience my feelings (alone), create space for my needs and do the things to meet them.
So, I am making sure I take those actions with me into next week as I am embark on my journey to teach at the Singularity Summit in San Francisco and then off to Portland for Camp Yes For Women. It’s funny because I realize that I am feeling emotionally the exact same way I was last year at this time. And I know getting the fuck out of dodge, AKA Los Angeles, is something that I just need to do in order to survive living here. And to take the time to remember it’s all connected. All of my gifts, and my circumstances, and my purpose, and my journey, and my destiny, everything is molding me. So as a wise friend said to me this evening, “Surrender, accept and release.”
So It’s time to tap into that frequency, that vibration that has always always been calling me forward. I deserve, I allow, I receive, I deserve to have the best experience, the fullness of life, this universe has to offer. I allow and I get out of the way and surrender to that which is beyond my mind, beyond anything I can conceive or comprehend. I receive the love of my practice and the power of my breath, and I receive the power in this movement. Here I am again, healing through my practice. And it's free. And below are just a few things I have been letting go of to create more of this space. There may be a thing or two in there that you can let go of as well. I encourage you to think about it.
I have been letting go of…
Old relationships
Lopsided friendships
Negative People
General Toxicity in my life
Worry
Dread
Self Bashing
The things that haven’t happened yet
The things or the people I am not passionate about
Approval and Validation
So Let it go, not for good, just for now…clear up energetic space and energy.
Release whatever is no longer serving you, create space for that which inspires you and let go of the need to have it all figured out. See if you can surrender to what is.
And on that note, good night, I love you for reading this, and I love you for you are human, just like me.